Submission is given not taken
This post is part of a monthly synchroblog. The topic for November is “leadership”. At the bottom of this post you’ll find links to other posts about leadership.
Today is election day in the USA, and many Americans are thinking about leadership. In the church, Christians often think about leadership as well. In fact, as Hans Kung has stated, leadership defines the church to such an extent that, for many, ecclesiology is simply an exercise in hierarchiology.
Whenever we discuss church leadership, the question of submission arises. Who is supposed to submit to whom? How do those “above” get those “under” to submit to their decisions? I suggest that these questions demonstrate a flawed understanding of the leadership that Scriptures teaches the church.
Starting with Jesus, he said:
You know that the rulers of the Gentiles lord it over them, and their great ones exercise authority over them. It shall not be so among you. But whoever would be great among you must be your servant, and whoever would be first among you must be your slave, even as the Son of Man came not to be served but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many. (Matthew 20:25-28 ESV)
Thus, according to Jesus, leadership among Christians is to be radically different – not front and center – but among and under. Leaders who follow Jesus’ example are not in front of a group directing them, but among and under a group serving them. Jesus was not talking about “servant-leadership”, but “servants”.
However, the more important point for this post revolves around the idea of “submission”. According to Hebrews 13:17, we are to “Trust our leaders, and submit to them.” This passage, and others like it, are often used by leaders to force, encourage, persuade, even cajole people into acquiescing to the decisions made by the leaders. This practice demonstrates a misunderstanding of submissions.
Leaders cannot force people to submit to them. This is not submission, but subservience. Instead, submission can only be given.
We often take instructions given to others and apply them for ourselves. For example, husbands often feel it is there responsibility to force their wives (or at least remind them strongly) to submit. Yet, the instruction is for wives to submit, not for husbands to force their submission (which is not submission but subservience or enslavement). Instead, husbands are instructed to love their wives. What does a husband do if his wife does not submit? He loves her.
The same can be said of leaders. We are told to follow or submit to those who are leading us. In reality, our submission demonstrates who our leaders are. Leaders are never told to force or even try to persuade others to submit to them. What are leaders to do if others do not submit? Keep living as an example of a disciple of Jesus Christ. We cannot choose whether or not people submit; we can only choose to obey for ourselves.
To look at it another way, is someone a leader if no one is submitting? If someone chooses not to submit (or follow) then I am not their leader – it doesn’t matter what “position” I hold, or what they say about me being a leader.
When Jesus began to teach about leaders among Christians, he pointed his followers to the “Gentiles” and said, “It shall not be so among you.” Today, most leaders in the church model themselves after the prevailing Gentile cultures and norms. But, this is NOT the type of leadership that Jesus taught.
Its time for believers to start following servants, not those who place themselves in the front of the group because of position or education or knowledge. And, its time for leaders to stop trying to force people to submit (which is not submission), and instead simply live their lives as examples of Jesus Christ. We persuade people to follow Christ, not our decisions and our leadership and our vision.
Submission is something that can only be given; submission cannot be taken.
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Below is a list of other bloggers who are taking part in the synchroblog on “Leadership”:
Jonathan Brink – Letter To The President
Adam Gonnerman – Aspiring to the Episcopate
Kai – Leadership – Is Servant Leadership a Broken Model?
Sally Coleman – In the world but not of it- servant leadership for the 21st Century Church
Alan Knox – Submission is given not taken
Joe Miller – Elders Lead a Healthy Family: The Future
Cobus van Wyngaard – Empowering leadership
Steve Hayes – Servant leadership
Geoff Matheson – Leadership
John Smulo – Australian Leadership Lessons
Helen Mildenhall – Leadership
Tyler Savage – Moral Leadership – Is it what we need?
Bryan Riley – Leading is to Listen and Obey
Susan Barnes – Give someone else a turn!
Liz Dyer – A Funny Thing Happened On The Way To The Polls…
Lionel Woods – Why Diverse Leadership is Good for America
Julie Clawson – Leadership Expectations
Ellen Haroutunian – A New Kind Of Leadership
Matt Stone – Converting Leadership
Steve Bradley – Lording or Leading?
Adam Myers – Two types of Leadership
Bethany Stedman – A Leadership Mosaic
Kathy Escobar – I’m Pretty Sure This Book Won’t Make It On The Bestseller List
Fuzzy Orthodoxy – Self Leadership
It’s called love
Andy from “The Narrow Road” wrote a stimulating post (at least for me) called “Maybe it’s just me“. He says:
There is something satisfying about having to come home after doing something for someone else and having to jump in the shower again because you got so grubby you didn’t feel you could be around real people anymore.
That’s the kind of morning and afternoon I had. It felt great. Even the dogs were pointing at the shower when I walked in the door.
And I am ready to go out and be human again now.
Just thought you should know this. Try it some time, you may like the feeling of working up a sweat for someone else for a change.
Like I told Andy in a comment, there’s a name for that grimy look and bad smell: it’s called love.
No produce, just relationships
At the beginning of the summer, our family and some friends began to visit a local government assisted housing development. Cathy, a friend of ours who is part of the church with us, introduced us to many of her neighbors, and we met other neighbors while spending time in the neighborhood.
When we started visiting the people in this neighborhood, we would take them small bags of fresh produce or fresh baked bread. Why? For several reasons. 1) The produce and bread were small tokens to demonstrate our concern for them. 2) Often charitable groups bring in old produce, breads, cookies, and cakes that other people would not buy. We wanted to give them something that anyone would want… not leftovers. 3) We wanted to give vegetables, fruit, and wheat bread to encourage a healthy lifestyle. 4) We were hoping the produce and bread would give us opportunities to serve them in other ways, including opportunities to proclaim the gospel.
A few weeks ago, the lady that runs the produce stand (Vivian – which is another story altogether) told us that the stand was closing. That morning, as we told the people in the neighborhood that the produce stand was closing, they all said about the same thing: “You’re still going to visit us, aren’t you?” Our weekly visits had turned into more than an opportunity to hand out produce. We had begun to build relationships with the neighbors.
So, throughout the week, I often find myself thinking about and praying for Cathy, Dennis, Tina, Mrs. Jeans, Shonna and her children (Marvin, Laruen, and Mya), Mrs. Woodlief and her son Benny, and Mrs. Fort. We’ve met a few other people in the neighborhood, but these are the ones with whom we usually spend the most time. These are the people who have opened their homes and their lives and have invited us in. (By the way, if you’re interested, we’ve posted some pictures from our visit last Saturday on our family blog in a post called “Friends and Family on Saturdays“.)
If you think about, please pray for Dennis. His father passed away last Friday, and the funeral is Monday.
And, pray for Cathy. She’s struggling with health issues – emphysema and back pain.
Also, pray for Tina. Tina’s son died from an overdose a couple of weeks ago. Tina ended up being hospitalized herself because of emotional issues a few days later. Now, she is dealing with several other issues related to her ex-husband and former care giver.
Pray for Mrs. Jeans. She had skin cancer on her ear last summer. The doctor removed part of her ear, but now something else is wrong. She has also been struggling with health issues, including a couple of weeks with the flu. Plus, her nephew is having family issues also.
If you ask Mrs. Woodlief, she’ll tell you to pray for everything. But, we know that her foot often hurts her, and she has to walk with a cane then.
And, Mrs. Fort will always tell her to pray for her knee. When the weather changes – which has happened alot lately – her knee hurts as well. If you think about it, also pray for the grandchildren and great-grandchildren who live with Mrs. Fort.
We can no longer offer these precious people fresh vegetables and fruit. We still carry fresh bread occasionally. But, they’ve let us know that they don’t want the produce and bread as much as they need the relationships. For many of them, we’re their only support system. We don’t have much to offer financially, but we can and do offer the love of God as often as possible.
Do you think there may be someone out there waiting for you to demonstrate the love of God? Why not start getting involved in someone’s life today?
Every member is a minister… really
In Scripture, every believer is a minster (servant) and every believer is a missionary (sent to proclaim the gospel). No… really… not just in theory. This is not something that’s interesting to talk about, it is our identity and purpose as followers of Jesus Christ. Thus, with this blog, I talk about what I’m learning and what I’m living. I’m certainly not perfect, and the people that God has placed around me are not perfect, but we are attempting to serve and proclaim the gospel to the community in which we live. Do we make mistakes? Absolutely! But, we make mistakes while doing… not while thinking or planning or wondering… but doing!
Tuesday morning, Dave Black posted a short article called “Christianity’s Prescription for Sick Churches” which included an excerpt from a Bible study that his son Nathan put together. (I’ve encouraged him to publish the entire Bible study online.) In response to this short excerpt, Dave says the following in general and about Nathan in particular:
Every member of Christ’s Body is a minister. Every function is a ministry. This means, as Nathan implies, that all Christians are to be known by one word: servant. This service to others is an obligation, not an option. The Bible teaches the priesthood of all believers, and not merely a few.
Nathan himself is a rank-and-file part of his small congregation in rural Virginia. There he leads and plays piano and teaches the Bible lesson every Sunday, not as a pastor, but as a parishioner. (The church, in fact, has no full-time “pastor.”) This is how he “washes feet” in Jesus’ name. He refuses to be paid for serving. After all, he reasons, I am an able-bodied man and can support myself.
Nathan truly practices what he preaches. What a rich heritage his children will have. No, there is nothing wrong with receiving an occasional love offering from others. But that, it seems clear from Scripture, is to be the exception, not the rule.
It seems like today everyone wants to give or receive a title before actually doing something. Nathan doesn’t desire the title “pastor”, but he “pastors” just as every believer should do. Nathan doesn’t want money for his service… then it wouldn’t be service… it would be a job. Instead, Nathan desires to “practice what he preaches” – he is serving the people among whom God has placed him. He wants to be known simply as a servant… like his Lord… who didn’t come to be served, but to serve.
What about you? Are you content being known and recognized as simply a servant?
Acts 20 and salaries for pastors
A few weeks ago, I wrote a post called “1 Corinthians 9 and salaries for pastors“. That post has turned out to be (in only a few weeks) one of my most read posts. Interestingly, in 1 Corinthians 9 Paul does not mention pastors (elders or bishops). However, in another passage, Paul does talk about the relationship between pastors and financial support.
After a near riot in Ephesus, Paul decided to leave for Macedonia and Greece, where he spent three months. (Acts 20:1-3) He then decided to return to Syria by travelling through Macedonia. At one point, he stopped in Miletus which is near Ephesus, and asked the elders of the church in Ephesus to meet with him. (Acts 20:17-18) For most of the remainder of Acts 20 (vs. 19-35), Luke records what Paul says to the elders of the church in Ephesus.
In the first part of his speech, Paul reminds the elders of his manner of living while he was among them. In the second part of his speech, Paul instructs the elders concerning their ongoing service to the church and the reasons why their service is so important:
Pay careful attention to yourselves and to all the flock, in which the Holy Spirit has made you overseers, to care for the church of God, which he obtained with his own blood. I know that after my departure fierce wolves will come in among you, not sparing the flock; and from among your own selves will arise men speaking twisted things, to draw away the disciples after them. Therefore be alert, remembering that for three years I did not cease night or day to admonish everyone with tears.” (Acts 20:28-31 ESV)
Most believers and most elders consider this instructions to be normative for leaders today. Thus, many books on ecclesiology and leadership will include admonitions for elders (pastors) to “care for the church of God”. However, many do not consider the next parts of the speech to be normative.
In the third part of Paul’s speech, he once again reminds the elders of his manner of living while he was among them. Then, in the fourth part of the speech, he again instructs the elders concerning how they should live after he departs and the reasons for this:
And now I commend you to God and to the word of his grace, which is able to build you up and to give you the inheritance among all those who are sanctified. I coveted no one’s silver or gold or apparel. You yourselves know that these hands ministered to my necessities and to those who were with me. In all things I have shown you that by working hard in this way we must help the weak and remember the words of the Lord Jesus, how he himself said, ‘It is more blessed to give than to receive.’ (Acts 20:32-35 ESV)
Notice that Paul begins by pointing out his own practices. When he lived in Ephesus, he says that he did not desire anyone’s money (silver or gold). Paul is very specific that he worked “with his hands” (and apparently a different kind of work than the previous work that he said he did ‘in public and house to house’ – Acts 20:18-21) so that he could provide for himself and other people who were with him. In fact, Paul said that they were witnesses to how hard he worked with his hands in order to support himself.
Then, Paul turns his example around. He tells them, “In all things I have shown you that by working hard in this way we must help the weak…” The phrase translated “we must” is usually translated “one must” or “it is necessary”. In other words, Paul is saying to these elders from Ephesus that it is necessary for them to work hard with their hands like he did so that they will be able to help those who cannot support themselves.
Paul did not expect these elders to receive financial support from others. Instead, he expected them to work so hard (in the same manner that he worked) that they would be able to support themselves and others too. Remember, Paul’s example for them was that he had worked hard enough to financial support himself and others. He reminded them of his example, and told them that it was necessary for them to do the same thing.
He finishes his exhortation with the words of Jesus: “It is more blessed to give than to receive.” Paul wanted the Ephesian elders to be examples of givers, not examples of takers.
This admonition seems different than the “right” of apostles as found in 1 Corinthians 9 and other passages. In 1 Corinthians 9, for example, Paul says that some have the right “to get their living from the gospel.” (1 Cor. 9:14 ESV) I suggesting in my previous post that the “some” in that passage (i.e. “those who proclaim the gospel”) are those who are travelling away from the home and their means of support. Of course, some of those travelling, like Paul, could work with their hands wherever they travelled.
But, elders – who were selected from the believers who lived in a city – were already living in the city and working with their hands to support themselves and their families. Paul expected elders to continue working – both “ministry” work and “working with their hands” – both are hard work and both are expected of all believers. This does not mean that people couldn’t show their appreciate for elders and others by helping them financially from time to time. But, Paul seems clear in this passage that he expected the elders at Ephesus to work with their hands in order to support themselves and in order to help others.
Now, one question remains: Is this passage normative for all elders or just for the elders at Ephesus? If the first part is normative for all elders (i.e. “Shepherd the flock of God…”), then why would the second part not be normative as well (i.e. “By working hard in this way it is necessary to help the weak”)? If you do not think the second part is normative, would you explain what has caused you to reach that conclusion?
Since the post on 1 Corinthians 9 generated some good discussion and good questions, I’m looking forward to the discussion here as well.
An encouraging day…
My wife and I returned home from meeting with the church around 3:00 this afternoon. The last 4 – 5 hours have been very encouraging. There are many things that I could write about this morning and afternoon, but one story in particular stands out to me.
After our morning meeting, we break for a few minutes to allow people to talk and fellowship. Then, after about 30 minutes to an hour – depending on how talkative people are – some people leave while others stay to have lunch together.
As one couple was leaving, they met an older lady on the street who asked them for money for food. They didn’t have money, but they invited her back inside to have lunch with those of us who were staying. (First, it was very encouraging that they felt comfortable inviting this lady to share lunch with other people. We try to treat each other as family, and that’s exactly what they did!)
When this couple brought the lady back upstairs where we were meeting, I immediately recognized her. Her name is Rita, and she’s a professional pan-handler. She goes around from place to place and asks for money. Her story has always been the same in the two years that I’ve known her: she’s recently lost her job; she’s recently had the flu; she wants a few dollars to buy groceries. If you offer to buy food for her, she’ll begin to ask for more and more.
I’ve bought her food before, gave her a ride home, and offered to help her find a job and to help her with financial planning. She wasn’t interested in any of that – she just wanted the money or the food.
I talked to Rita for a few minutes – she told me the same story. I mentioned that I had talked with her before, but instead of condemning her, I invited her to stay for lunch. I told her that my wife had made chicken salad and that she was welcomed to join us. I told her that we would be eating in a few minutes. She said she would come back in a few minutes to eat with us, and she left. I did not expect to see her again, and I didn’t. I explained the situation to the young couple, and thanked them for caring about Rita and bringing her back in for food. I told them that they did the right thing.
A few minutes later, another brother came in to have lunch with us. He was not able to meet with us that morning because he was giving a man a ride to the hospital to visit his dad. This man’s dad was in ICU and they were taking him off of the ventilator this morning. I’m glad that my friend decided to minister to this family instead of meeting with us this morning.
When my friend sat down to eat lunch with us, he told us he witnessed another conversation between Rita and another man who had been meeting with us, but could not stay for lunch. As this man was talking with Rita, he recognized something about her. He begin to tell her that he had once struggled with alcoholism, and that he thought she was struggling with that as well. He explained how he was able to withstand the temptation to get drunk because of the indwelling Holy Spirit. He then shared the good news of Jesus Christ with her. He also invited her to come in and eat with us as well – even though she rejected the gospel – and told her that she is always welcomed to join us, either for our church meeting or for lunch afterwards.
I am so glad that God has surrounded me with brothers and sisters who truly care for people. Both the young couple and the man was concerned that Rita said that she needed something to eat, and both attempted to meet her need. While I know the young couple was concerned about her relationship with God, they did not have an opportunity to say anything because she left. But, our brother found a way to connect with her through their mutual struggles with sin, and used it as an opportunity to care for her spiritual needs as well as her physical needs.
I pray that God will continue to give us opportunities to serve him by loving other people.
Excited about today
I’m excited about today, Saturday, October 25, 2008, for several reasons. [Thanks for the correction, Scott!]
First, our family and another family have been regularly spending time in a government assisted housing development on Saturday mornings, and occasionally at other times as needs arise. I have not been able to spend time in this neighborhood on the last two Saturdays because I was out of time one week, and my family was sick the next week. So, I’m excited to see the neighbors again.
Second, I’m excited because several people have expressed interest in joining us this weekend. I don’t want to build a huge “Saturday morning ministry”, but I do believe that as people serve God and love others, he will give them more and more opportunities to serve and love. So, while these people may not continue to go with us on Saturday mornings, I do believe that they will get more involved in other people’s lives because of their willingness to start serving. (In fact, I would prefer they spend time in another neighborhood, or in the same neighborhood but on another day.)
Third, I’m excited because a couple has expressed interest in teaching a Bible study in this neighborhood. This is something that I – and some of the neighbors – have been praying about for several weeks. Hopefully, we’ll be able to introduce this couple to some of the neighbors, and they’ll also be able to spend time in the neighborhood with the purpose of teaching Scripture.
So, whatever happens today – and today is certainly in the hands of God, not my hands – I’m excited about the prospects and the opportunities.
Serving or being served? Loving or being loved?
As I’ve mentioned several times, my family spends time in a local government assisted housing development. We’ve become friends with some of the residents, and we’re still getting acquainted with others. Of course, we started spending time in this neighborhood because we desired to serve and love the residents.
Last weekend, Margaret and I and some friends visited one of the neighborhood residents in the hospital. She talked about how much she appreciated getting to know us all, and she thanked us repeatedly for serving and loving her. The funny thing is, it seems to me that she serves and loves us more than we do her. It seems that I’m learning more from her than she could possibly be learning from me.
So, I wasn’t surprised when I read what Brandon at “Eleutheros” wrote in a post called “Muhammad“. Apparently, Brandon has been spending time in an apartment complex in which many refugees live. He has recently met a young boy named Muhammad who has been a trouble maker. This is part of what Brandon wrote:
Last night, he was glued to me. I found out last week that both his mother and father physically abuse him, they yell at him rather than speaking to him and his father is very distant…when he’s not hitting him. He was like a completely different kid last night. He did have some moments, but he sat right down beside me and actually listened to the lesson. As we sat there, he put both of his arms around my right arm and his head on my shoulder as he listened to the story of Joseph. Again, my comfort zone was BLOWN WIDE OPEN! In our culture, guys don’t do that with men they don’t really know…or with guys they DO know. (In Africa this is not unusual behavior for boys or men) But the Holy Spirit reminded me that this kid is SO hungry to get attention and that he needs to see how God loves him. So I sat there with him until we were through with the lesson. Honestly, it was amazing. This kid who was one of the main reasons I didn’t want to do this is being knitted to me by God. It’s very humbling because my attitude was, “I’ll go, but I’m NOT going to deal with this Muhammad kid God, he’s your problem to deal with!”. I can see God smiling and saying, “Really?”. Last night when it was time to go, I went to give him a high five and he asked for a hug. He also wanted to know when I was coming back. This is nothing less than an act of God. I’m excited about what He is doing and what He is going to do in and through us in Clarkston.
I noticed that Brandon is dealing with the same issues that I’m dealing with. He went to this apartment complex to teach and love children. But, instead, he is the one who is being taught and he is the one who is being loved.
It is amazing how much God can teach us when we begin to give or serve or love just a little – when we actually start obeying him. I’ve also noticed that it is difficult to learn about serving and loving while you’re only reading about it or talking about it.
Activities = Service and Community?
Mary at “One Thing is Needed” wrote a post called “Unplugged” in which she considers some questions that I’ve been contemplating as well. Mary begins with this statement:
As a “leader” in our CLB [“Church Left Behind”], I often encouraged people to get plugged in to our church. This really meant that I wanted people to take part in the various ministries and activities with our church. I’m not sure why I thought being plugged in was such a good thing.
She concludes with this:
Yesterday I was thinking about being plugged in when I remembered that I’m already grafted in to the Vine. When I compare the two ideas, the thought of being plugged in is suffocating and exhausting, yet the idea of being grafted in is freeing, comforting, and restful.
Have we confused the two? Do we think that being plugged in to a local church’s activities somehow makes us grafted in?
I’m not sure, but for now, I’m going to stay unplugged and continue to remain grafted in.
I’ve been thinking about this questions from a different direction. Is being “plugged in” to a ministry program the same thing as serving one another? How would you compare or contrast the two?
Is being “plugged in” to ministry programs the same as being part of a community? How would you compare or contrast the two?
Lessons from the Trail 4 – Burdens
In this series, I’m writing about life lessons that I learned while hiking part of the Appalachian Trail with my son and two friends. This “Life Lesson” is about bearing burdens.
At the end of the first day of our hike – after 9 miles – my legs starting hurting. The next day started fine. But after a few miles, we began hiking uphill. I found out that I could not pick my foot up to take a step up because of the pain in my thighs. I could walk on level ground, and I could walk downhill, but I could not walk well when we were going uphill. And, unfortunately, for the next several miles, we were walking uphill.
I slowly made my way up a few hills, and climbed over some rock outcroppings. But, my legs started hurting even worse as I forced them to do something that they did not want to do. Eventually, the other three people in my group took my backpack so that it would be easier for me to walk. It was still painful, but it was not as painful.
So, for a few miles, until we turned downhill, I did not carry a backpack, and the other three (mostly Jim) took turns carrying two backpacks.
I have to admit that this was very hard for me. I like to serve others, and it is difficult for me to be served. However, it was better for me as an individual, and better for the group, for them to carry my pack while I did not carry a pack.
From that difficult afternoon, God clearly taught me about this passage:
Bear one another’s burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ. For if anyone thinks he is something, when he is nothing, he deceives himself. But let each one test his own work, and then his reason to boast will be in himself alone and not in his neighbor. For each will have to bear his own load. (Galatians 6:2-5 ESV)
I could have refused to admit that I had leg problems – but, of course, it was obvious to everyone that I was walking slower and slower. I could have refused their help. They could have refused to help. But, because I admitted my own weaknesses, and because they helped me instead of condemning me, we were able to continue walking together.
Note that they could not relieve me of my “load” – my leg pain. My legs continued to hurt, and there was nothing that I could do about that. However, they could bear my “burdens”, so that I could walk more easily under that “load”.
I think this is one of the most important lessons that God taught me on the trail. It was a difficult and painful lesson, but an important one. Today, we often refuse to admit our problems. This is the sin of pride. Our pride tells us that we must seem to have it all together to those around us. We can’t seem weak or needy.
Since we don’t know one another, others cannot recognize our problems and weaknesses. This is also a sin, related to refusing to love one another. When we love another, we give up our own time in order to focus on others so that we can get to know them. Instead, we walk along carrying a burden alone when God has provided others to help us.
Even when we recognize someone’s problems or weaknesses, we tend to condemn or ridicule that person instead of coming along site that person and helping them to bear that burden. This is also a sin – the sin of refusing to love or refusing to accept a brother or sister. Many times, we simply don’t care about the person enough to help them. Other times, we’re afraid that if we bear someone else’s burden, then our own burden (plans, desires, goals, etc.) will not be accomplished. We put our own life and growth ahead of the life and growth of the community.
Do you know people in the church enough to recognize when they need help with a burden? Do you care enough to offer help? Are you willing to ask for help yourself?
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Lessons from the Trail:
1. Introduction
2. Preparation
3. Watching
4. Burdens
5. Leaders